As I’m coming up on the three month mark since having my double bypass surgery, I’m happy to report that aside from some frustrating blood sugar issues, I am doing very well. I’m getting stronger each day that passes and I have learned so much about this recovery process that I never imagined. I’m finally, finally feeling somewhat back to where I was (only better) before this all started and so I thought I would put together a little post on what I wish I had known about bypass surgery before I had it. In hindsight, the fact that I was told I needed the bypass surgery the day before I had it was a huge blessing in disguise. I know now that I am the type of person that would have driven myself crazy with the anticipation of having to wait to have the surgery done, so having it done quickly was better for me. However, it gave me no time to read up and know what to expect afterwards, so I hope this might at least help someone.
Bypass Surgery Recovery Is Tough
I thought the surgery itself would be the most painful and difficult hurdle, but that was actually the easy part. After my surgery, I quickly learned that recovery was now my full-time job and it was the toughest one I would ever have. I had NO idea how helpless I would be due to not being able to use my upper body strength. I had to have help adjusting myself in bed, opening my food containers in the hospital, using the restroom, taking a shower, and dressing myself. I was completely stubborn and determined, so working past a few of these issues (like the bathroom and shower situation) became my first order of business once I got home. My husband was amazing as my caretaker during this time, and I am so blessed I had help while in the hospital. Within a week’s time, showering was doable, but it still required being very careful and having assistance to get dressed afterward.
You will also deal with emotional recovery after the surgery as well. I cried every day for a month straight after getting home from the hospital. I could not believe how fast my life had changed and was extremely frustrated by how long it was taking me to recover. I felt scared at times like if I went to sleep at night I wouldn’t wake up. I also felt paranoid, like I wasn’t being told everything about my health situation. But most of all I felt guilty for now having to ask for help because I am the type that hates to have to ask for help. I have been told the anesthesia used during surgery might make you feel like this, but I think this is just completely normal after having this life-changing experience. It’s important to remember if this happens that IT DOES GET BETTER. I was blessed again to have a mother and grandmother taking care of me when my husband was at work and they refused to let me get depressed about things. I would let myself have my daily cry, I leaned on those who were my support system, and then I moved on to something that made me happy, like playing time-sucking video games on my tablet and blogging when I felt like it. For you, this might mean watching TV or something else. You won’t feel like doing very much at all at first.
I also highly recommend the book Positive Mind, Healthy Heart! Take Charge of Your Cardiac Health One Day at a Time by Joseph Piscatella. This book was so helpful to me when I had some tough days and it really lifted my spirits. Piscatella is a bypass patient himself who is 40 years post-surgery and healthy. He has a vast collection of helpful books on heart health, motivation for heart patients, and cookbooks to help you grasp the new way of eating you have to adopt.
And another little tip? The first time you have to sneeze after heart surgery will hurt. I avoided sneezing until about 2 months out and it still felt uncomfortable the first time I did it. 10 weeks later it still makes me “brace for impact” before I do it. Coughing hurts, but not as much. They will give you a little pillow in the hospital like this heart-shaped pillow to hold to your chest to take the pressure off when you cough or sneeze. The pillow never made much difference for me, though.
Things That Made Recovery Easier
The most surprising thing I learned once I arrived home from the hospital was that I couldn’t sleep in a bed. The hospital bed was very deceiving, because I was propped up and adjusted by the touch of a button. Having a recliner (and a short one, because I am short) was a lifesaver because I slept in it for 4 weeks. I couldn’t lay flat in a bed because of the pressure I felt from my sternum healing and all of the pillows in the world at first didn’t help that situation. The recliner was my lifesaver. Eventually, I got tired of sleeping there and needed to stretch out a bit more. After week 4 I was able to prop myself comfortably in a bed using the arm pillow I talked about in this post.
So when could I sleep normally in a bed again? About 9 weeks after surgery, and I still use two pillows. I’m sure that number is different for everyone, but considering how much I love my sleep, it would have been nice to know beforehand.
Ladies? Listen up, because this next part is for you. Especially if you are very well-endowed up top. You will be given a surgical bra to wear after surgery and you will definitely need it because if you are well endowed up top your chest will feel like it weighs 500 pounds. I was given one in the hospital and another to take home, but I ended up having to order another one online because the ones I brought home began to eventually lose their ability to offer support. I live in a small town and no medical supply places near me carried these surgical bras, so I ordered this surgical bra for plus-sized women. I am just now at 10 weeks able to wear a regular bra and it still feels a little weird. I even alternate between the surgical bra and regular bra when I feel like I need more support. And while we are talking about “girl stuff”, my cycles have been completely thrown off by this surgery, so there is that as well.
(UPDATE: My cycle returned 3 months after surgery)
Things Might Be Different
Your taste buds may also be a little different after bypass surgery. I suddenly found that some foods I used to love didn’t taste quite the same anymore. I also developed a craving for ice-cold sodas that were clear or flavored water. This, from a Diet Coke addict! My husband made sure to stock me up with my favorite drinks before he would head out to work.
Your perspective on life may also change after bypass surgery as well. Naturally, you will probably feel grateful and even more appreciative of life and determined to make the most of it from here on out, and that’s great! One thing I have also noticed about myself is that the little trivial things I used to dwell on and worry about just don’t bother me anymore. I am trying to eliminate as much stress as possible and some of those trivial things just don’t have any room in my thoughts anymore, and I am glad. Your priorities become even more clear after a major life event such as this.
If you are facing bypass surgery, please know that recovery, although tough, is temporary. Almost three months out I am still having to remind myself of this. If you are impatient it can be very easy to get discouraged and frustrated, but it’s important to relax and take it easy at first so you don’t injure yourself while you heal. The last thing you want is a setback. My surgeon was very frank with me and told me that it may take me a whole year to feel completely healed from this surgery. At three months post-surgery, I’m feeling so much better. I can’t wait to see how great I feel even further down the road!
Thank you for all your comments. I’m going in next week for dual bypass. It was hard to find information from females on this journey, so really appreciate this post.
I pray your surgery goes well! Let me know how you do!
What you say about having surgery so abruptly being a blessing in disguise, I can once again relate. My situation was finding out I’m diabetic, but I have also said it was a blessing in disguise the way I found out … an ambulance ride, a night in ICU, and 13 days in the hospital with c*vid/pneumonia. If I’d been told in a doctor’s office after some test, I would have just cried and felt like a failure, and probably had a much harder time. The way it happened for me, I was in shock from everything going on, just accepted the diagnosis along with everything else happening, and had time to learn what I needed, and help from the nurses while I recovered. If I’d been given the news in a doctor’s office and sent on my way, I don’t know how I’d be right now.
We’ve had very different situations but it’s oddly comforting that the thought process in life altering situations is similar. Makes it sort of feel like we’re doing it ‘right.’ lol
We sure DO have a lot in common, huh? I’m still in awe of how much our lives are similar! 🙂 I have Type II Diabetes, and I had to take insulin shots when I was pregnant with my son. I have struggled with it for 18 years. But I know yours is a much bigger struggle. I guess going through all of these things helps when you are already in the hospital and can’t exactly run away, huh? LOL! I also have a morbid sense of humor sometimes. I remember the night before my surgery just being so resigned to it all…just zoned out. So thankful we are both on the other side of these things! 🙂
What a true and amazing story! Thank you!
I had a double bypass in March 2020, 6 weeks after my 47yr old brother passed from complete blockage. I was 50 yrs old. I had arranged a stress test for the 6th.. failed it. Onto a angiogram.. way too blocked for stents. March 7th it’s my emergency bypass and Covid-19 . I was hospitalized 7 days with no visitation. The depression was the worst. Not sure of the cause.. the surgery or losing my only brother. Or both! Luckily I had received a nerve block, that lasted a whole year. I was in no pain whatsoever. Sent home and husband was completely stressed out on caring for me, that stressed me out!! Not hungry dude.. I’m not going to die from not having lunch.. RELAX! God bless his sweet heart.. i wished i had read this post then.. but it’s right now. 2 weeks after getting home, and feeling good, i started to do lawn work, DO NOT DO IT! I was re-admitted for congestive heart failure! Now i live with that too. I think i did too much too soon. But.. who knows. I’m 18mo post op , doing well but REALLY HATE MY MEDICATION. Makes me feel 90. My blood sugar levels are high and i do get harped on about that EVERY TIME. I’m doing things so good!! How can those numbers be so high?? That’s my complaint.
Rest assured, we now have a stronger heart.. and a stronger love.. you will get they this!! Your a heart warrior! Good luck to every one of you… take care.
Thanks so much for stopping in and sharing your story, Pam. I always love to hear from other heart warriors. It’s my hope that as we share our stories, we can help someone else feel like they are understood. Praying that you continue to be strong and recover!
Thank you so much for this! It has really helped to calm my nerves. I am fetching my mother from the hospital today after she had a quintuple bypass. She has been in the hospital for almost a month already and I am so nervous about doing the wrong thing or making sure she has everything she needs. She says she only wants to eat bland food so I have been googling bland food diets like a crazy person but naturally not a lot of information available. But your post has provided such a clear description of what the healing process entails that I realise, she and I will just have to navigate this thing together as we go.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!
Mandy: Thank you so much for sharing.
Out of the blue my husband had chest pains that sent us to the ER. We later found out the chest pains had nothing to do with his heart. Luckily we went. After many tests he was sent to a neighboring hospital that did cardiac surgeries. If the surgery wasn’t scary enough, this all happened amid the Covid-19 crisis!! This meant shortened visiting hours and then no visiting! I don’t know how we managed. He was in ICU in serious condition and I had to stay home. All I could think of was that he was there in a place that was very scary because of the virus and I was at home with nothing I could do! 1 1/2weeks out of surgery I watch him like a hawk and worry about what a cold or the virus could do to him. Time will tell. No one has been able to visit…not even our kids. We continue to pray and believe! This to shall pass!! We are bracing for recovery and are glad to have input from this community! Stay safe!!
Paula, I sure hate he had to go through this right now. I’m glad it’s behind him and he can just concentrate on recovering. Yes, absolutely lean on your faith. That’s definitely what got me through that tough time. Thank you so much for stopping in and I’m saying a prayer for you and your husband for his continued healing. Please stop in and update me if you can. Thanks for popping in!
My mom just had triple bypass surgery and I was on Pinterest looking for information that would help me understand how to assist her in her recovery. Stumbling across your blog really helped paint a clear picture of the things I may encounter during this process. You don’t know how grateful I am to receive this firsthand knowledge from another woman. I truly appreciate the insight you’ve shared and will use your experience to help my family understand what my mom needs in her recovery as well as what we need to do to assist and support her. Thank you for sharing as I’m looking forward to future updates in regards. 🙏🏼
Thank you so much for stopping in! I do hope your mom is recovering well. It’s a long process, and she may not feel like herself for many months, but I promise it does get better. It just takes lots of time!
Thank you for sharing your experience with open heart surgery. My mom(57 yrs) just had it today. She was terrified going in and I felt for her. All went well, but she was not awake yet. I worry about when she first wakes up, the discomfort and confusion, and What if I am not there. I just want to do all that I can to make her recovery easier. Again thank you for your insights.
Chandra, I am so glad you stopped in. I hope by now that your mom is home and resting comfortably. Please give us an update if you can. Thinking of y’all!
Thank you ladies. I appreciate your stories so much. My husband will have bypass surgery. We are seeing the surgeon on Tuesday. He is in complete denial. He doesn’t want anyone to know, so I’m doing all the research.
We also run a business from home and I’m trying to learn his part of the business.
Hearing other people talk about this journey helps so much.
We both teach First Aid and CPR!
I certainly hope his surgery went well and that he is on the mend. Please give us an update if you can. Thank you for stopping by.
I know exactly what you are talking about here for I had this surgery also, Like you mine was done the day after finding out it had to be done so I also did not have time to research. I was 48 years old in 2012, 6 years later it’s 2018 and I still find bras hurt and the wire used to put a person back together still aggravate me. It’s a reminder everyday of that journey. My cycle went haywire for a short time also but then it threw me into early menopause. That came on like a sudden raging storm. The sweating was like a bucket of water got dumped on me every ten minutes every hour for several weeks. It was scary. A lot of things just all of a sudden scared me now. My fear of certain driving situations still has not gone away. A lot of stuff that use to bother me didn’t and stuff that didn’t bother me does. This surgery does change a lot about a person. I also became allergic to things and had several scary bouts with that. Also the leg they took a vein from to fix my heart for about 3 years felt like my leg was too short now and like the veins were not long enough to join together right in that leg. It still feels weird and don’t work like it did movement wise but things don’t feel too short anymore just kinda a nagging pain. And I don’t know how things got done across the chest area but my left breast often times aches like something in there got connected a bit short too. My heart was different in that when I was having the heart cath done they found my heart had begun trying to heal itself. I am very thankful I survived this and it does change you and no they didn’t tell me how it would change me. Yes the getting comfortable to sleep, the sneezing, learning to bathe and dress is a slow process. I felt depressed at times and teary at times. Some things get better and some things I’m not sure will ever go away but I have adjusted and carry on. I just felt like telling my story too . If it can help someone to know that what they are going through is not insane, they are not alone, or to help them be prepared as much as possible about that things will change , I will feel so glad. Many blessings to all the heart bypass survivors! You are tough!
Gayle, I’m so glad you stopped in to share your story. You are so right….this is a VERY life changing surgery that almost nothing can prepare you for. I think women have a unique situation because it affects so many other aspects (our cycles, how clothing fits, etc.) of our lives. I’m just so thankful to be on the other side of this surgery and pray that my arteries will hold up as long as I do. I hope you are doing well! Please stop in when you can and keep me posted on you!
Hello Mandy,
I just wanted to share my story.
I had gastric sleeve done on Sept. 2016, well everything that you are warned about happened to me. At first the recovery wasn’t too bad, i kept complaining of pain quite a bit of pain. Every time called the office to let them know what was going on, the said that it was probably due to me not eating correct and or too fast. So I continued to with the pain i call the office once again and was told it was psychological. The pain was so excruciating that I went to the ER and found out that I had gall stones. So the information was sent to my doctor’s office and I was set up for surgto have my gallbladder removed this was about 6 months gastric.
Then about three months later I had pain once again and once again I was calling the office, same as before I was told it was behavioral. So once again the pain too intense, there is was back to the ER and turned out that I was passing a kidney stone. I had to be seen by a urologist. Which they did absolutely nothing but want the stone once passed. I finally passed the stone.(Thank the lord) . Ok if all this was not enough I was continuing to have abdominal pain and had to sleep just about sitting up, so one again call in the office, you can imagine what they were thinking, well I was seen and it turned out to be acid reflux. So now I was told to try pepcid and see if this would help. Guess now, you got it after three months of taking the pepcid was told that I needed to have corrective surgery. That entail changing the sleeve to gastric bypass. Wow I am just tired of typing out much less reading all of this. Now remember all of these things were explained before gastric sleeve that they could possibly happen even rare. Ok now I am finally trying to recover once again. I had to start all over, from the beginning. Unable to eat solids, very small meals and so on.
Just as I thought I was better back to my self I had something else come up. Well I was having episode of sweating,, dizziness, feeling like passing out. Well i almost did everything went total black and I was seeing like stars. Oh also I was so incoherent, I was alone I was trying to call my sister. I was unable to figure out the phone, I was walking like I was drunk. Well any way I was sent to a endocrinologist now this took about three months to see. In the mean time I was continuing to have these episodes. I was an internist and was sent to see another dietitian. This was because I lost way too much weight. I was 103lbs., was told by the dietitian I needed to gain some weight, now can you imagine that! After all of this work! I gain some weight, I hated and hated my self every time I got on the scale. I hated seeing the scale numbers going up. During that process I was told I have a eating disorder and need to see a treatment center. Ok, ok, now this ridicules. I finally see the endocrinologist and was told I have hypoglycemia. Once again this was also explained very early before the bypass. Per the endocrinologist she has seen this a lot with bypass patients.
So now there you go my story. Sorry so long but I was one of those patients that if it could happen it will happen to me. Sorry if any misspellings.
I also apologise that it is so long.
Interesting!
Practical Parsimony